Learning to FLY

Ola! This blog has been moved. I am going back to my WordPress Blog -

It's a magical world Hobbes ol' buddy

 

See you when I see you!

"Most days of the year are unremarkable. They begin and they end with no lasting memory made in between. Most days have no impact on the course of a life."

Today,  ladies and gentlemen, would have been one such day, a day which can be easily forgotten in the hustle and bustle of daily activities because no popular/political event is associated with it. So what does our regular IT Joe do on such a day? What difference does today make to him, whether the day is a Monday, a Tuesday, a Wednesday or a Thursday? Zilch, you may rightly say. (Fridays are holy)

You see, before we ever comment on Joe's work, we must first understand Joe as the person he is and not by his profession, i.e., keeping aside all the stereotypes. P. G. Wodehouse would have said that Joe is a chirpy bloke, who leaves home from office with all the spirit in the world and who in health and in sickness loves his lighter more than his girlfriend. He is pretty well, the only guy who knows that life is mean and he's far better than being depressed about it. He does forget a few emotions common to the common man but he's OKAY about it. His name, when he dies, will NOT make it to the headlines of any national television and actually, he never had any such desire too.

Joe, is a nice chap with a good taste in movies and loves eating Pizzas and drinking truckloads of coffee. And more than anything else, Joe thinks he's unique and unlike any other Joe in the world. So, Joe does some mundane work to feed himself and satisfy his materialistic desires and IMHO, that's cool. There's a joy in spending one's own hard-earned money, and it is unmatched.

Here's to all the Joes who have made my last two years absolutely memorable!

Atheists of the world, Unite!

Set in the backdrop of the glorious city of Alexandria of 491 A.D., Agora, the forgotten story of the first communal war in the history of mankind, is brought to life by a very famous Spanish director. Taking a bird's eye view of the world at that time, the movie focuses impartially on its three warring parties, the Pagans, the Christians and one single Atheist. It traces the lives of that atheist, her slave and the General of that city who was once her student.

Though much of the screen time is covered by its big star Rachel Weisz playing Hypatia, Davus, her slave who is confused between supporting his people and his master, was my protagonist. He shows that however far we are today in 2010 from 491 AD, we still fight in the name of God and destroy everything in our way. When I say we, I mean "Humans". There are in that mob, many people who did not want to fight, did not want to hurt others but were dragged into it by their indecisiveness and peer pressure, and then too had some soft corner for some people. He was an Atheist, a Christian and a Pagan all at once, which is the state of most of the world population today.

With marvelous sets and special effects, the movie also brings to light that amidst this war, we had lost lives, money and more importantly, the great library of Alexandria, which if was untouched that day, would have helped us reach the moon some 300 years back itself! Coupled with some minor flaws, this movie is a good watch for a blank mind on a serious day.

 

Sir Pelham Grenville Wodehouse is God.

Yesterday, after a lot of delay I had finally laid my hands on a copy of Jeeves and Wooster, Season 1 Episode 1, the T.V. adaptation of Woody boy's good old classics. I confess, my expectations because of the author were very high. Add to it, as per IMDB, the series has a ratnig of 8.9/10 at present with some amazing reviews. I expected that I will laugh as much as I do when I watch Tom & Jerry or even some Brahmanandam scene in any Telugu movie. And, the series ran for four seasons. Common, that's enough reason for any Wodehouse worshipper to watch it.

But sadly folks, the episode sucked. Big Time. Looking back at some of the characters, Bertie Wooster reminded me starkly of Akshay Kumar from any of his recent stupid comic attempts. There was gross overaction and no humor. Jeeves was FAT, not even healthy. The Jeeves image on some books was what i had pictured Jeeves to look like. Aunt Agatha was irritating to say the least. I can go on folks but want to stop it here.

With utter disappointment, I recomend any Woody fan out there to give it the adaptataion a skip. Not even a try. It's hopeless.

 

Image courtesy Wikipedia.

Well no. I am not talking of the driving ability nor the agility with which the careful & sensitive Hyderabadi Cab & Auto drivers traverse through the busy and polluted roads just to take us to our destinations safely. No.

The objective of this essay is to help you understand the greatest fact of life: "Himesh Reshammiya is THE Almighty" - with the motto: When there is faith, there is no fear.

 

Picture this: You are sitting on the back seat of a Tata Sumo at 11:30 in the night and that too after 9 to 15 hours of mind numbing work. The driver is half asleep and so are the rest of your "cab-buddies". The folks who have iPods or MP3 phones, plug them into their ears and snore away into oblivion and that leaves you alone, the aam admi/aurat, at the mercy of the driver's awesome MP3 collection or his favourite FM Station. Everything seems innocent and before you know what hit you, a loud "Dhin-Chik Dhin-Chik" sound starts coming from right under your own seat. The speaker system is so state-of-art that the seat atcs like a trampoline. If you understand the language of that chart-busting song, you will understand the lyrics of the song. Incase you have never tried that or don't understand the language of that song, try it the next time.

To cut your curiosity short, I present a very popular song on which our very own Abhishek Bachchan (of Paaaaa fame) dances to:

Appudi Phode Phode Phode
Asathi Phodu kannaale
Ippudi Phodu Phodu Phodu
Izhuthu Phodu kayyaale

Which literally translates to:
Put it like this,
Put it like that,
Mesmerize me and,
Put it like that,
Put it like this,
Pull & put, like this, like that!

Hmm. So. Well, I leave it to you to imagine what happens to that one person, listening to this song at 12 in the night in a cab/auto. I am no hater of the dhin-chic clan of music but THIS setting is too much for probably even Mithunda's biggest fan to digest.

The driver, you see, is a bloody egoistic guy (haven't come across a female driver). He does not like the rest of the folks listening to their own music on iPods & MP3 players while he's playing such excellent music. And out of uncontrollable anger, he increases the volume. One of the daring folks requests the driver:

"Bhaiyya, thoda volume kam karo please".

Duh! The driver has all his Ayn Rand Objectivism in place, like "he exists only for himself" and "he is the only one who controls the volume button of the music system" blah blah blah. Basically, he's pissed. First you make him a universal brother Bhaiyya and also dare to speak to him in Hindi? When in Telangana be a Telanganite, he thinks! And further up goes the volume. Aaah, Oooh! 4000Watts of unadulterated bliss and all coming from under your own seat. How fortunate are you that you spend almost 2-3 hours of every single day of your pointless existence listening to these soul rising and life fulfilling songs. Who the hell needs Zakir Hussain & Pandit Ravi Shankar after these or even A R Rahman? God is there, very much, and looking down upon you and smiling his heart out. And, at this point I would like to let you know that the protagonist of this story is not you but my humble self, I.

At that moment, when the whole world seemed so hazy and I felt so close to God, the historian in me came alive and tried to figure out where this all started. Well folks, remember the Summer of 2006? No, not Mumbai Train attacks nor the nuclear treaty. It was that glorious summer that a new star rose in India and took Indian music industry to an all new level. He had been around but then created hysteria... a huge fat guy with a cap started a sensation called

"Tera Tera Teraaaa Surrrrrooooooooooooooooooooooooo
oooooooooouuuuuuuunnnnnnnnnnnnnrrrrrrrrrrr".

(the nnn was added for the nasal effects)

Remember that? Yes, yes ... I can see that expression on your face - "Aaaah" (a full faced smile with moist eyes) I know. It was an unprecedented hit and almost got him a few Grammies, just that the silly Americans could not understand what was being sung. Duh! Morons. What the heck is Jai Ho or even Roja in front of that. For his achievements in that glorious summer, the "All India Auto & Cab Drivers Union" named him their "Man of the Century". To prove his cynical critics that he's not overrated and and he's got the talent to deserve the award the next year too, he doled out "Aap Kaa Suroor", the movie. Thanks to India's popular and favourite news channels Headlines Today & India TV, this was the Song of the Year 2006 in both the channels and was used as background score for various Automobile ads. Those years, his popularity threatened folks like SRK, Shashi Tharoor and Aamir Khan that Shashi joined Twitter, SRK bought an IPL team and Aamir went crazy and made Mangal Pandey. We all know what happened to their efforts. Huh. Who can even come close to Himessss? To please his fans/followers/devotees he doled out 3 films and numerous albums since then and there are several more in the pipeline. There is also a story of how an auto-wallah learnt english and html and created a page for him on Wikipedia. If that is not enough, the rest of the folks at All India Auto & Cab Drivers Union, in order to show their belief that God exists and has come down to the earth in the form of Himesssss, have passed a fatwa to play his songs in all vehicles and thereby, also enlighten those folks who work so hard and miss out these basic essentials of life.

 

Himess is God. Period. If you dare to disagree and think you can go and do a hunger strike and people will listen to you, you are mistaken! The driver will just turn the volume further high. Peace.

 

Phew. On another note, who the bloody hell introduced Drums & Remixes to the India music industry. Ass. I humbly wish to play "Appudi Phode Phode" & "Suroor" on the day of that crackpot's funeral eve.

 

One of my fav's ...

“Thousands of years ago, the first man discovered how to make fire. He was probably burned at the stake he had taught his brothers to light.

Centuries later, the first man invented the wheel. He was probably torn on the rack he had taught his brothers to build. He was considered a transgressor who ventured into forbidden terrritory. But thereafter, men could travel past any horizon. He had left them a gift they had not conceived and he had opened the roads of the world.

 

“That man, the unsubmissive and first, stands in the opening chapter of every legend mankind has recorded about its beginning. Prometheus was chained to a rock and torn by vultures—because he had stolen the fire of the gods. Adam was condemned to suffer—because he had eaten the fruit of the tree of knowledge. Whatever the legend, somewhere in the shadows of its memory mankind knew that its glory began with one and that that one paid for his courage.

 

“Throughout the centuries there were men who took first steps down new roads armed with nothing but their own vision. Their goals differed, but they all had this in common: that the step was first, the road new, the vision unborrowed, and the response they received—hatred. The great creators—the thinkers, the artists, the scientists, the inventors—stood alone against the men of their time. Every great new thought was opposed. Every great new invention was denounced. The first motor was considered foolish. The airplane was considered impossible. The power loom was considered vicious. Anesthesia was considered sinful. But the men of unborrowed vision went ahead. They fought, they suffered and they paid. But they won.

.............................  read the full speech here

Sometimes in our lifetime, we come across something so beautiful, so amusing that we cannot stop but think about what we have just seen or heard. It can be a match of cricket where a batsman like Sehwag has demolished a bowling attack or a Formula 1 race where a driver comes all the way from the last place and goes on to win it or a speech delivered by a teacher or a letter from a friend. Basically, the source may be different but the effect is quintessentially the same - making a lasting impression on us that there is more to life than just sitting at a workstation and typing away thousands of lines of code or making PowerPoint presentations, more than just sleeping away your entire weekend and cribbing that the Monday is already here. Did we always think that when we grow up, we will be stuck to a seat and that the television or a laptop will be our only sources of entertainment?

We are prisoners of our own past. We crib that we miss childhood? Did we not face troubles? For a kid in his 1st standard, his annual exam in math is as difficult as the CAT paper to an MBA aspirant. We did have problems and knew how to fix them too. We did differentiate between good and bad. Then the choices were could be filtered with one question "Will Mom/Dad scold me if I do this?" Life was black and white. We did not care if the father of kid who sits next to us is a CEO or a cobbler as long as his handwriting was good so that we can copy form his book, we did not care if the guy wears a Louis Philippe shirt or got it stitched from a local tailor as long as he's the best batsmen in the class or the teacher likes him.

We miss childhood because we had a clear picture; we knew our priorities very well and did what we wanted. We were free thinkers. We never tried to control any one or judge any one... we do that after we "grow up". This whole bull shit about growing up, maturity and awareness is a myth. It’s an illusion created by a bunch of ppl who are dying of inferiority complex. I hate it when people look down upon the noble profession of teaching. It hurts me when they say law is a noble profession. If that was the case, why the hell are so many cases still pending and the bloody terrorist who attacked innocent ppl in Mumbai for 26/11 still alive and called ACCUSED of all things! It hurts when ppl say working in a big company is their dream. If that is the case, they haven’t woken up. Your dream is something that will make u happy by itself, not something that can help you get to a place where you can BUY happiness.

I. I once came across someone who asked me what I would do if I had a million dollars & told me that's what I actually want in life. Seriously. Think about it for a moment. What do you want? Not the white collared zombie job. I want a page on Wikipedia dedicated to me. When the next time I open google.com, and start typing "K", I want my full name to appear as the first result and in fact all first 10 results. I want to make a short film. I want a bunch of school students to call me O Captain! My Captain! I want lots more and my job does NOT prevent me from doing it! As u can understand, I do not say quit your job. No, it's a necessary evil, the slogging and working. We need food to eat and I understand that and also, with a little pain like that, even sugar will taste sweeter than it actually is.

I don’t like Chetan Bhagat and also did my part in trending #chetanblocks on twitter but can’t deny the fact that the fellow gave an amazing speech SIBM last year. An excerpt of it:

There is no point of getting a promotion on the day of your breakup. There is no fun in driving a car if your back hurts. Shopping is not enjoyable if your mind is full of tensions.

"Life is one of those races in nursery school where you have to run with a marble in a spoon kept in your mouth. If the marble falls, there is no point coming first”

Don't take life seriously. Life is not meant to be taken seriously, as we are really temporary here. We are like a pre-paid card with limited validity. If we are lucky, we may last another 50 years. And 50 years is just 2,500 weekends. Do we really need to get so worked up? It's ok, bunk a few classes, scoring low in couple of papers, goof up a few interviews, take leave from work, fall in love, little fights with your spouse. We are people, not programmed devices........."

Each day I count the hours until the day's over. Then I count the days until the weekend. Then I count the weeks until the month is over, and the months until the next holiday. To do what? Wait for what to happen? End of the World? Death to come? What excites me is that life is temporary. I am too impatient to wait for death to come. If only, I knew the date, I would make a list of things to do and places to see and plan accordingly. And guess what, I already started my list and done with 2 of those! Ah life. My life! … Where are you in yours?

Still not convinced?  I recommend you to watch these movies – My list of “Watch before you Die” (in no particular order)

Fight Club – A brash slap in the face of consumerism and the working dead. It questions reality. It is strikingly thought-provoking and visually stimulating. The direction is incredibly brilliant.

 

 

Into the Wild – Humans want to work till 60 and then retire. And then there was this guy who almost got into Harvard Law, who realized the fact that life is temporary, much ahead of his time. He retired at 20 and started living and doing whatever he wanted to. Mixed with great music, this movie will either move or bore the viewer.

 

 

Good Will Hunting - A story of a 20 something stuck up in a wrong job and accepting that that’s his life somebody else comes and tells him what he’s worth. A simple story told very well.

 

 

Dead Poets Society – An English teacher encourages a bunch of students to do more in life, that there is more to life than just engineering and medicine, more than tradition and honor, more than marks and grades. There is art in some form or the other, but basically, art.

 

Dil Dosti Etc – An unconventional movie which takes on ego of man and what we do to satisfy it. Watch only if you think you are broad-minded. (and Yes. I do have an inflated Ego.)

 

 

Dasvidaniya - An average guy comes to know that he's about to die very soon and wants to have all the fun in life before he dies. So, he makes a list of things he wants to do. This will drive the viewer to moist eyes. (Dasvidaniya means goodbye in Russian)

 

 

American Beauty - A guy in mid-life crisis realizes that he must get a grip over his life and starts doing all that would have done when he was younger. Epic.

 

If you are someone I know and/or living in Hyderabad, drop by. I have them all and totally believe in piracy and would love to share these. If not, drop a comment, will help you get those. None of these have any lovey-dovey emotions, not that they are bad, but these are about self discovery. These movies rock!

 

Hum Kis Gali Jaa Rahe Hain ...Hum Kis Gali Jaa Rahe Hain… Apna Koi Thikaana Nahi!

 

P.S.The original title of this post was Catharsis. Later changed to Watch before you Die. And finally ... So, it begins.

Premise: The book has a simple premise and it is written on the back cover of the book and more or less forms the whole story. For those who haven't read that:

Boy loves girl. Girl loves boy. They get married. In India, there are a few more steps: Boy loves Girl. Girl loves Boy. Girl's family has to love boy. Boy's family has to love girl. Girl's Family has to love Boy's Family. Boy's family has to love girl's family. Girl and Boy still love each other. They get married.

Target Audience of the book: If you are

1. In a mood to chuckle at a few of your regionalistic co-citizens
2. In a mood to mock at the tortures one has to endure when he/she opts for an "approved love marriage"
3. Want to watch a Bollywood song and dance movie, an SRK rom-com,
4. Or simply put, if Kuch Kuch Hota Hai or DDLJ or similar films feature in your favorite movie list....

Wait no further; shell out 95 Rupees and read on. You will fall in love with it. For the rest of the world, which does not fit into any of the above four categories, and that includes my humble self, it's a nice time pass read. Nothing out of the blue and Chetan Bhagat is no Harper Lee, no Ayn Rand or Tolkien. He's not trying to make people think differently. He's plainly presenting a story with a lot of sarcasm. No harm in reading one such book, once in a while :) Plot: 2 States lies in a genre somewhere between modern love and humor. And rightly so, the author sticks to these two very specifically and almost on every single page of the book there will be some witty one liner or incident that will make the reader chuckle a little. Almost on every page. The fun element is very high. On the whole, it's a mockery of India's 2 favorite stereotypes : Punjabis & Tamilians and a story of what happens when love blossoms between a Punjabi guy & a Tamilian girl. A generous 40% of the book is based on making fun of Tamilans, another generous 40% on Punjabis and 20% on sentiments, love, national unity & etc. When it comes to content, it feels more like the screenplay of a Karan Johar movie than a book. It simply has no narration, no detail as to where the people are and what they are doing. The first half of the book, is far better than the second half. There is too much of chamchagiri and gyaan in the second half.There is a very very very, rather extremely high chance of this being made into a movie... no cult type movie but a typical popcorn masala Ranbir Kapoor, Deepika Padukone types. Characters: The story just revolves around these 2 love birds. There are a few supporting characters here and there, like the stereotype silent father of the girl, the over sensitive mother of the boy, the nosy aunts and the neighbours who have no other business apart from gossip, the studious brother, the incompetent boss and so on. No one worth mentioning, even the protagonists are not unique in any way.. IIT IIM yes, but the characters of these two are cliche. The flow of the story is as predictable as any of Ekta Kapoor's serials or even worse. There at least you have some background music, dhoomdhaam. Some of the parts of the book are simply ridiculous, like a 25 year guy saying "Dad, I Love you" and "Mom, I love You" type dialogs which are nothing short of silly. And then some Guru coming and cleansing his mind is so impossible  to believe. There is no point discussing the story or fear of story being revealed because Chetan Bhagat has written the whole story on the back cover of the book and there is nothing  apart from that in the book. Final Verdict: Serious book readers, who want to READ a book & not watch a movie - STAY OFF. Rest of the world, those who do have a few hours to kill, want to have a laugh at Tamilians and Punjabis or want to have fun. Read it. I am a self-declared fan of P. G. Wodehouse and Ayn Rand, one who loves convoluted plots and mystery or heavy gyaan or speeches on individuality and found this a useless read. I did laugh, so did not mind :D. Heard from a lot of people that they liked it...It won't kill you :D

Clementine: Are you NUTS? Joel: It's been suggested.

When something  ends up in a messy way, you plainly wish that it should never have happened, like a movie you should never have seen. When you go through a break up or a heart break, you wish you could just forget that person forever. One moment you are euphoric and because of one reason or the other, you start to hate each other. Doesn't this happen often? Is it possible to really forget that one person and all the memories attached to her/him? How would it be, if this was possible? This movie, explores the possibility where you are given the chance of deleting that one person who, you believe, caused you all that grief & pain.  So basically, it explores the two fantasies of the human mind, one, the ability to forget the whole thing, to wipe out the whole painful experience with that person away. The other, to start fresh with the same person as though nothing has happened.

Clementine: You're not a stalker, or anything, right? Joel: I'm not a stalker. YOU'RE the one that talked to me, remember? Clementine: That is the oldest trick in the stalker book. Joel: Really? There's a stalker book? Great, I gotta read that one.

Plot: A lonely guy and an impulsive girl strike a conversation in a train. Opposites attract is the law of cinema and thus there, their love story begins. They later break up and bump into each other very soon but by this time, Clementine had erased all her memories about Joel. She fails to recognize him and when he gets to know of this, he's devastated and opts for same. While going through the memory erosion, he realizes that he was actually happy with her. But wakes up the next morning not remembering a thing about Clementine. Later they get to know that each got the other erased out of their memory. What they do after this, is how the movie ends. I have over confidence in the beauty of this movie that even if I reveal the story there is nothing one can understand without watching it. The experience of the viewer is something he/she would never have even imagined before ...

Clementine: Wish me a happy Valentine's Day when you call. That'd be... nice!

Screenplay: It is bizarre; one would actually have to pay a lot of attention as to what is happening since we are dealing with the memories of Joel and also the affair between Clementine & Patrick and the Doctor and his employee. It is not linear, it follows the natural path of the memory of Joel. Though the movie is stated to be in the realms of sci-fi, its focus is on the mostly the emotions of the lead characters and the relationship they share. It is in reality, more of rom-com but unlike any you will ever  see.  You might feel a little good after watching it but once you start thinking about it, you will get to think about all the people in your life and your memories and how you have fought with someone and how you relate to them now.

Joel: I could die right now, Clem. I'm just... happy. I've never felt that before. I'm just exactly where I want to be.

Soundtrack: Music dept. is very impressive and compliment the screenplay perfectly. There are a few Hindi songs which play in the background and I felt patriotic about them :D. Apart from that, Something, Keep on Looking and Everybody's got to learn Sometime are real good. They might not be so interesting when heard otherwise but blend into the movie "perfectly".

Clementine: You're really nice... God, I have to stop saying that!

Acting: Jim Carey's role is nothing like he has ever done before. He's not a dumb guy and there is no silly making fun of himself anywhere.  He's a practical middle-aged guy who believes that he repels women. Kate Winslet as the impulsive, free-spirited girl is sensational. Together, they do an extremely difficult task of adding life to this abstract story. They make it believable and give the performances of their lifetime. The other actors are also equally impressive. Jim Carey truly deserved an Oscar for his performance.

Joel: Why do I fall in love with every woman I see who shows me the least bit of attention

Final Verdict: The film is "NICE". I am stuck onto this word ever since I have seen this movie. At the risk of sounding clichéd and unimaginative, I declare that this is my "favorite movie and it is a masterpiece". I have recommended it to everyone I know, and many did not like it but those who did like it, fell in love with it. Movies like this will never be made again and you should not miss out on this. A perfect entry to the list of movies to be seen before you die. P.S. The name of the movie is taken from a poem of Alexander Pope and it goes like this: "How happy is the blameless Vestal's lot, The world forgetting, by the world forgot; Eternal sunshine of the spotless mind, Each prayer accepted, and each wish resigned." P.P.S. Here's the promo [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n86My_3jl6A]

At every nook and corner of an IT company, one is bound to find so many coffee vending machines, popularly known as "Espresso" machines. Being a bhola bhala bacha, for all my 21 years, I was all into Pepsi & 7Up until I landed here and suddenly people use the word "Over a cup of Coffee". Without beating around the bush, I declare Espresso Coffee SUCKS. It's fast and easy to make and that does not mean that its tasty in any way. You might say that I did not make it properly blah blah blah, but trust me, the last 15 months, this has been my biggest mystery and tried learning the art of making coffee using espresso and even the most experienced chaps (in terms of coffee drinkers) are hopeless. There were so many occasions that I did not have breakfast and there was still a long time for lunch, so I go & fill my tummy with some of this brown thing. It tastes bad, but I know for sure, it's going to serve the purpose. Is coffee something like beer? Tastes bad, stinks big time but gets you on a high.... The expert - Coffee Day eh?  Huh, the coffee dere is as hopeless as it was at the free espresso, just a lot costlier! I tried every flavor at CCD. The taste remains the same. Days are so bad for CCD that people go there to have things like Samosa & Paneer Puff! Huh! So, here is my conclusion. I have no idea what the taste is, but it kills sleep and I don't mind having it to stay awake and to help people in Hyderabad - I declare the best coffee shops in town - Minerva Coffee Shop & Chutneys:  Have a sumptuous dinner and after that, have a cup of hot coffee... That will be the your most refreshing moment, ever. Period And on a parting note.... a steamy wallpaper ;)